***POV = Point Of View. That person will narrate the story.***
~Disclaimer : This story features mature language. Most Profanity & Other unsuitable words will be blanked out with “***” This is a heads up for any cautious readers~
Hey guys, Josh here-… well… you guys know me by now *laugh* I’m so silly. Anywho! I’m here at my parents house, hanging out with Ollie, Our Dad Ben, and our Uncle Nathan. Its nice to have guy time with the family. I know you guys are wondering how the heck I could be so chipper with everything that’s going on, aren’t cha? I’m honestly just trying to be a mature adult.
There’s other things to think about. Like Vince, and Kokoro, Issac, and his billboard. Oh! and Finally.. Gabrielle and Jordan doing sex! I’m so happy that Jordan finally got something he wanted. He’s been having a rough time, same can be said about Issac. Which brings me to this… Who needs love? it just breaks your heart in the end anyway right? I mean sure I want Issac to have Riley, and Jordan to have Gabrielle.. and sure I even want to see Vince and Kokoro married with kids- but its only because I know they want those things.
I don’t know how I feel about relationships and love anymore- and incase you’re wondering- no Sasha and I have not broken up. We haven’t even spoke about everything yet. We will later today though. Speaking of “Today”… Maybe I should pay attention to what’s going on with my family..
Oliver – You okay Josh?
Josh – Huh?- Oh yeah.. I’m fine Ollie, just wrapped up in my head.
Nathan – About what?
Ben – Is it because Gabrielle is with Jordan?
Josh – No I’m fine with that, I have no romantic feelings for her. I do wish she’d fricken talk to me though. I want to be friends again.
Oliver – She’ll come around.
Nathan – Eh…
Ben – Well atleast you’re done with Sasha! Those Owen women are nothin’ but trouble.
Nathan & Josh – ………
Oliver – You broke up with her Josh?
Josh – No, we’re going to talk today, to work things out. I’m going to let her explain herself.
Ben – What’s their to explain? she was BOINKING that professor!
Oliver – What?
Josh – Huh?
Nathan – Ben… nobody says Boinking anymore…
Ben – Well she was having sex with that man- is that better?
Josh – Can we change the subject please?
Oliver – So didn’t take you long to put a pool table down here dad. Josh hasn’t even been gone that long.
Ben – Well Nathan convinced me to turn this basement into a mancave.
Josh – You guys been bonding lately?
Oliver – Isn’t that cool Josh? Dad, and Uncle are just like us.
Ben – What would make this even better is a few brewski’s
Oliver – You know I’ve taken a liking to beer lately.
Josh – Well you two hang tight. I’ll run to the store to get some.
Ben – Thank you son.
Nathan & Ollie – ……….
Oliver – I guess everything’s good betwen you and Josh dad?
Ben – Things are fine. Nathan was right, I’m too hard on him.
Josh – *smiles*
Nathan – *smirks* By the way Josh, remind me later to call Jordan. After he cleaned out his desk, he forgot a few things.
I keep forgetting that Jordan quit his job. Maybe its for the best considering he’s involved in a custody battle- not that Briana is putting up much of a fight. Its Liana who’s taking care of Briana’s affairs.. sad.
Josh – I’ll remind you, and If I forget I’m sure super brain over here will remember.
Oliver – Of course.
Josh – Lets hurry and get back before they kill each other.
Oliver – You don’t think the bonding will last?
Josh – Those two are about as friendly as Cyclops and Wolverine when Jean Grey’s in the room.
Oliver – …..True- though maybe they’ve changed?
Josh – Lets hope so.
Oliver – Should we get Mom, and Scarlett anything while we’re out?
Josh – They’re at the spa, I doubt they’ll be back anytime soon
Oliver – True…
Josh – Which is fine, after that big breakfast they made everyone, they deserve some rest and relaxation.
Oliver – Can I drive?
Josh – We’re not taking the truck, we’re going to the store around the corner dork.
Oliver – Oh okay.
Josh – So how’s Tru?
Oliver – Tru’s good.. we’re good.
Josh – Still can’t believe she likes a nerd like you.
Oliver – Hey! I’m a cool nerd remember.
Josh – Ollie, I’m joking, you’re the best. Its obvious why she likes you bro.
Oliver – Thanks- Eboni
Josh – You’re wel- What? why did you call me Eboni?
Oliver – She’s here- with Gabrielle.
Josh – Oh….
You guys remember Ollie and Eboni had a thing in the past right?…. Just checkin’
Oliver – We should say hi.
Josh – ….I guess so.
Josh – Hi Eb’s
Eboni – Hi Josh
Gabrielle – Hey Ollie
Oliver – Hello.
Eboni – I didn’t know you were coming home for spring break Blaze-
Oliver – You can call me Oliver- or Ollie… That nickname isn’t fitting as before.
Eboni – Why? you don’t smoke weed anymore?
Oliver – Actually I’m quite fond of the kush.
Eboni – How can you be so nerdy, but so cool at the same time?
Oliver – It remains a mystery to me too.
Gabrielle – Josh- Hey…
Josh – Whats up?
Gabrielle – I was actually on my way to see you.
Josh – Really?- with Eboni?
Gabrielle – She’s on her way to the store for twinkies.
Oliver – I’m actually going to get beer for my Dad and Uncle
Gabrielle – You two go to the store, and give Josh and I some time to talk?
Eboni – Eh… okay.
Josh – You sure?
Oliver – We have no bad blood between us. Its fine, you talk to Gab. Eboni and I will go to the store.
Josh – Alright.
Gabrielle – Thanks Ollie.
Oliver – No problem.
Well I guess Its now or never with Gabrielle. If things don’t go right this time, I’m done trying. Lets hope for the best.
Oliver – Lets go brat.
Eboni – Oh shut up *laugh*
Oliver – What made you come home for Spring Break?
Eboni – I figured why not, actually AJ is the one who convinced me.
Oliver – AJ and I drove up here yesterday. You should have come with us.
Eboni – Oh I would have but Drake insisted that I spend another night with him.
Oliver – He dropped you off?
Eboni – Nah, My sorority sister did.
Oliver – How is ol’ Drake these days?
Eboni – He’s fine… How’s Tru?
Oliver – She’s good…
Eboni – Heh….
Oliver – What?
Eboni – Nothing…
Oliver – No, spill it.
Eboni – I don’t know, I just wonder what it would have been like if we stayed together.
Oliver – *shrugs* Who knows.
Eboni – I mean.. never say never I guess…
Oliver – I’m sure you love Drake, and I know I love Tru, but…. who knows what the future can bring.
Eboni – Yeah…
Oliver – So…
Eboni – Yes?
Oliver – I heard a rumor about Drake…
Eboni – What?
Oliver – That he likes doing it with guys secretly.
Eboni – That’s bull… Trust me I’d know.. he loves every inch of me!
Oliver – We sure have changed…
Eboni – That’s what we’re supposed to do right?
Oliver – Yeah, I guess you’re right.
Josh – You know how I feel about everything that happen.
Gabrielle – ….Right.
Josh – So… How do you feel? and can we move past it?
Gabrielle – Josh, I want to move past it, but theirs one thing that still bothers me.
Josh – What?
Gabrielle – I don’t feel like you took any responsibility for any of it. I know my actions were not the best, but the important thing is that I knew I did some things wrong. In my honest opinion, you sorta got away with it, because its like “He’s sweet innocent Josh” I-
Josh – Wait…. Gabrielle you think that?
Gabrielle – You’ve never said otherwise, everyone was left with “Oh Gabrielle is crazy, poor Josh” You made me feel ugly, alone. Obviously it wasn’t your intentions, but thats how I ended up feeling after it was all said and done.
Josh – I’m sorry. I….. I felt bad about everything, which is why I didn’t just be with Sasha right away- Maybe it wasn’t enough though. Maybe I should have come to you, and told you that I was sorry, and I-
Gabrielle – You did say sorry, you said it multiple times, its just that- I don’t think you even realized what you were saying sorry about.
Josh – ……I-… You’re right.
Gabrielle – And you couldn’t have really come to me and told me anything, considering I was ignoring you…
Josh – Yeah…
Gabrielle – ….I just…
Josh – I understand… and I’m sorry, for making you feel that way, and for not doing my part. I obviously played a part in the breakup, and I should take responsibility for that
Gabrielle – Thank you….
Josh – So are we okay?
Gabrielle – One more question though..
Josh – Hmm?
Gabrielle – What is it… that I wasn’t giving you?
Josh – Huh?
Gabrielle – Well I’m curious. What did Sasha offer you that you weren’t getting from me.
Josh – *sigh*
Gabrielle – Its okay. I can take it.
Josh – Communication…..
Gabrielle – ……I see….
Josh – I just couldn’t talk to you, you would get so mad, and upset over things that weren’t even happening and I-
Gabrielle – In a sense I made you and Sasha talk more… I ran you away, she was there and- It makes sense.
Josh – I didn’t see Sasha like that at first, and then because of our fighting, I got to know her more, and… things just sorta happened.
Gabrielle – *smiles*…. I’m not innocent. I started to notice that I was more myself with Jordan.. which worried me. I thought I was a terrible person. How could I possibly have feelings for Jordan when I was with you. So I put the thoughts in the back of my mind, and tried to focus on us.
Josh – You and Jordan make more sense…
Gabrielle – …..I think you’re right.
Josh – I know I am, Jordan loves you.
Gabrielle – *smirk* I know.
Josh – So everything’s okay with us?
Gabrielle – Yes.
Josh – Finally.
Gabrielle – I know right?… I know you were thinking “How much longer is she going to drag this out?!”
Josh – Yeah.. I was just hoping we could put this all behind us.
Gabrielle – And we did. We’re good.
Josh – Good- Can we hug?
Gabrielle – Of course silly..
Gabrielle and I returned to my house and sat on the porch. We talked about Jordan, and other current events. Finally Ollie and Eboni returned and we went our separate ways. Gabrielle, and Eboni went home. Ollie and I returned to the basement to get beat by the old folks in pool *laugh* After that I went upstairs and took a quick nap on the couch. I had time to reflect on the conversation with Gabrielle. The thing is, I knew what part I played in the breakup. I guess I failed at not letting her know it wasn’t all her fault.
I’m not perfect… I’ve never been one to say that. I don’t ever mean to hide behind my….whats the word….Lets just go with “Obliviousness” I always just try to smile, and fix conflict with rainbows and sunshine. That’s not realistic, and perhaps I should work on that. Umm… So umm.. moving on. I woke up when my cellphone vibrated. It was Sasha, she was ready to meet up…. and so…. we did.
Josh – ………….
Sasha – ……You okay?- Rough day?
Josh – I’m still waking up.
Sasha – You slept all day?
Josh – No, I took a nap.
Sasha – How was your day?
Josh – I had Breakfast with Ollie, my parents, and My Uncle Nathan- who brought his girlfriend Scarlett. After that My mom, and Scarlett went to the spa- which left us guys alone.
Sasha – Oh.. that’s cool. What did you guys do?
Josh – We played pool, and stuff and we- Sasha?
Sasha – Yeah?
Josh – Enough about me, what’s going on with you?
Sasha – Sorry… I just missed hearing about your days… we haven’t exactly talked in a minute..
Josh – Which still confuses me on our relationship.
Sasha – You said we were done, I-
Josh – It was my anger….
Sasha – I know, which is why I gave you space, even though I tried calling you a few times.
Josh – I didn’t answer because I was mad.
Sasha – I understand…….
Josh – ………….
Sasha – Isn’t it ironic that I wanted us to meet here?
Josh – Why?
Sasha – Well… remember? this is where we told each other how we felt?
Josh – …..You’re right, I do remember… Hmm…
Sasha – Well….. enough beating around the bush…. We-
Josh – I didn’t give you any time to explain anything.. I saw you, I saw him, and I lost it.
Sasha – Right…
Josh – So… explain to me why you lied to me, why you were seeing him.
Sasha – Okay….
Josh – …..
Sasha – For the past month…. I’ve been hanging out with Professor Oswell- Keith.. I’ve been seeing Keith.
Josh – …..A Month…
Sasha – Just let me get everything out.
Josh – ……
Sasha – He got into town about two months ago, and tried to get in contact with me through my mother.
Josh – What?
Sasha – My mother told him to stay away from me. Which is why she’s pretty upset with me because of all of this. Anyway.. Around the end of last month, I went to the dentist to get my teeth cleaned.
Josh – ….
Sasha – And I ran into him. That’s when it started.
Josh – When what started.
Sasha – He needed to see me. His wife left him, and took the kids. He was alone, and wanted to see me.
Josh – So just because he was wifeless, and kidless he thinks he can just have you?
Sasha – At first I didn’t know what to think, but then I realized I wanted closure from him.
Josh – I see, but why did-
Sasha – Josh… let me get this out
Josh – ….. Fine…
Sasha – So I started having lunch with him… whenever I could. I thought it was me wanting closure but then…
Josh – Did you have sex with him or not?!
Sasha – No! I didn’t!
Josh – …… I don’t understand! why did you lie to me?, to Shannon?!
Sasha – I don’t know!
Josh – What do you mean you don’t know?
Sasha – I don’t f**king know Josh!
Josh – ……..
Sasha – I didn’t sleep with him- but…
Josh – But?
Sasha – Something isn’t- What I’m trying to say is… things aren’t black and white in this situation.
Josh – And by that you mean what? Stop talking and pausing just say whatever it is you have to say Sasha.
Sasha – I didn’t sleep with him, but I didn’t want to stop seeing him.
Josh – Are you still in love with him?
Sasha – I-
Josh – Answer the question…
Sasha – I don’t know if I’m not still in love with him…
Josh – Wow… after everything he’s done to you?
Sasha – Its not that simple, I-
Josh – Why do women like men who treat them like crap?!
Sasha – He’s a good man Josh, you don’t know him… He-
Josh – Really?….
Sasha – Josh…
Josh – How are we suppose to move forward now?
Sasha – …..that’s why I wanted to talk… I think we should break up.
Josh – ……………………….
Sasha – Its not you, its me.
Josh – …..Wow….
Sasha – Obviously I’m confused, and my actions with Keith shows that I still have things I need to workout in my head. I didn’t give myself enough time to heal, I just got back into town, and got into a relationship with you.
Josh – What?! I-
Sasha – I know you can easily jump from one relationship to another but I-
Josh – I may do that! but its only because I believe in love, and I don’t believe in just doing sex with random girls! What’s wrong with being a relationship kind of guy? Would you prefer if I was a jerk?
Sasha – Time between relationships, is normal… its what I should have done…
Josh – Okay so you lied to me, broke my heart, and now you want to try and give me life lessons?
Sasha – I want to still remain friends Josh-
Josh – Go f**k yourself Sasha.
Sasha – I’m trying to be a mature adult here
Josh – Which totally makes sense considering you’re hot for grandpa.
Sasha – Real mature Josh….. Just.. be mad. Hate me, but I’m doing the right thing. This is about me, I need to figure stuff out.
Josh – Well do it without me.
Sasha – How is that fair?!
Josh – Fair? Really?
Sasha – I want you in my life! Just because its not as a boyfriend you’re going to hate me?
Josh – You always make everything about you! Always!
Sasha – Josh, come on…
Josh – Bye Sasha… go back to Bridgeport…
Sasha – Is this how we’re going to end it?
Josh – I’m sick of this! I always end up dumped! Just leave me alone and don’t call me.
Sasha – Please Josh, don’t shut me out.
Josh – …….
Sasha – Josh…
Josh – Bye….
………….Single again. Is something wrong with me? Am I too nice?…..too stupid?….. I don’t even- I was willing to work things out. She breaks up with me because she needs to figure things out, what kind of crap is that? Either you have feelings for the Professor, or you don’t. I feel like she knows, but she doesn’t want to say it outloud. I don’t know if its because she doesn’t want to accept it, or if it has something to do with my feelings- heh… my feelings, why should she care now…
Josh – Go away Kane….
Something I think is funny, is the fact that Mia tried to keep Sasha away from him, but of course somehow they ended up crossing paths… Whatever… So sick of-
Josh – Kane! I don’t feel like talking about it right now!
Amanda – Its not Kane…
Josh – …..
Amanda – I know you said you didn’t want to talk about it-
Josh – So Kane told you?
Amanda – ……Yeah…
Josh – ……What a big mouth.
Amanda – He sent me in here…. He thought I could make you feel better.
Josh – …. Can I ask you something?
Amanda – Sure…..
Josh – Why do women like assholes?
Amanda – ……I don’t know- Its different for alot of women. Some of them like to be treated like shit because they have low self-esteem. Some just like the bad boy quality..
Josh – Do you like them?
Amanda – I did, but I perfer good guys these days. They may finish last in everyone else race, but in mine… they always get first place.
Josh – …….
Amanda – Umm..
Josh – How do you feel about Casual Sex?
Amanda – Umm.. Its casual sex… It doesn’t have to mean anything… sometimes you just need to do it… Its not for everyone though. I feel like sometimes you need to not care.
Josh – ………
Amanda – ………..
Josh – I-
Amanda – What are you doing?
Josh – Not caring
Amanda – ……Josh… stop.
Josh – I thought-
Amanda – Umm…
Josh – You don’t like me?
Amanda – Its not that, I’m attracted to you, you’re a good looking guy.
Josh – Then why won’t you have casual sex with me.
Amanda – Because its not casual… We know each other, we have a history. You’re roommates with my brother. I see you all the time and I-
Josh – Then lets run away from here! we can go to Europe or something
Amanda – *smiles* We can go to Europe one day Josh, but running away right now isn’t the answer..
Josh – *Sits down*…… What’s wrong with me?
Josh – Why am I so stupid?
Amanda – You’re not…
Josh – I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have tried to kiss you.
Amanda – Its okay…..
Josh – …….Traveling isn’t what I need either… I don’t know what to do. Dumped, rejected by you and-
Amanda – Its not that I don’t like you. I just- well you just broke up with Sasha…
Josh – Apparently that’s my problem.. I go from relationship to relationship. I’ve never believed in casual sex, and I just…
Amanda – With everything that happen, it made sense to try it?
Josh – ….. *starts to cry* I just don’t want to be alone.
Amanda – ……You don’t have to be.
Josh – Will you stay with me?
Amanda – ….Okay.
Josh – I promise not to touch you…
Amanda – Its okay… I’m not going anywhere. Lets get you off this floor.
Josh – Its comfortable
Amanda – You want to stay on the floor?
Josh – ….
Amanda – Alrighty…..
Josh – …………
Amanda – ……………….
Josh – I-
Amanda – Theirs nothing wrong with wanting a relationship. You do need to give yourself time though. Find out what, or who you want. Be friends first.
Josh – …..
Amanda – I know you don’t want to hear that but-
Josh – …………
Amanda – You’re sleep and didn’t hear any of that……….*laugh*
Josh – ………..
Amanda – Goodnight Josh…. *closes eyes*
The next morning I woke up with back pains. Stupid floor. I also woke up next to a note from Mandy. It read :
“Josh, I had to go do something for the bar. Hope you feel better- Oh and about our “almost kiss” If somewhere in the future you still want to try.. I won’t object. I just think right now is not the best time for either of us. Feel better dork 😛 – Mandy”
I was so messed up last night, I don’t know why I did what I did. Amanda is pretty, and nice… but I’m not interested in being in a relationship at the moment. I just figured she’d be okay with something casual, and she wasn’t- and neither was I. My emotions caused me to lose all sense of logic. As far as my feelings for Mandy goes, I think she’s a great person, and friend. That’s all… For now. I won’t rule it out in the future though. Anyway… I ate some cereal, and then got a text from Issac. He wanted to meet up.. So that’s where I went…
Michelle – What was it about him?
Issac – I know… its crazy that Riley of all people made me feel that way.
Michelle – Stranger things have happen… don’t forget that all things-
Issac – Happen for a reason.. yeah…
Michelle – So I was out looking for an apartment earlier, and guess who I saw?
Issac – by your tone I’ll assume Vanessa?
Michelle – And Quinn.
Issac – Did they see you?
Michelle – Oh yeah… Quinn waved at me.
Issac – She’s such a b***h….
Michelle – So is Vanessa…
Josh – Hey guys!
Its funny that he wanted to meet at the old beach house. I haven’t been there in a while. Once I sat down with them, I told them about my day from hell- aka Yesterday.
Josh – I don’t know what I was thinking….
Michelle – You and Mandy….. hmm
Josh – I don’t know…
Issac – Well… Sorry about that Josh… Atleast one good thing did come out of it though.
Michelle – Yeah, You and Gabrielle patched things up.
Josh – Yeah I’m happy about that… sad about everything else.
Issac – Join the singles club.
Josh – Well-
Issac – You and Mandy going try things out once you’re all healed from Sasha?
Josh – I don’t know?
Issac – Well…. atleast see it as an option.
Josh – She is-
Michelle – Cool…
Josh – So how did this come about?
Issac – What?
Josh – This hangout?
Issac – I’m in town with Kaitlyn, she’s doing something for an old teacher.
Michelle – I’m house hunting, I ran into Issac, and we decided to get breakfast and hangout.
Issac – So I invited you.
Josh – Oh cool.
Issac – ……So you and Mandy… ha….
Josh – Stop it…
Issac – *laugh* Sorry.. its just funny.
Josh – It is funny, and embarrassing…
Michelle – Well atleast she’s an option…
Josh – What about you?
Michelle – What about me?
Issac – Do you have any options?
Michelle – I actually met a guy.
Josh – You did?
Issac – Well tell us about him
Josh – I thought you said you were going to date a girl?
Michelle – Well… much like Amanda and you… things just happen like they’re suppose to..
Issac – Where did you meet this guy?
Josh – What’s his name?
Michelle – I met him on my way to work in Bridgeport. On the subway- Oh and his name is Matt, short for Matthew.
Issac – What does he look like?
Michelle – Umm he’s about Jordan’s height… He’s caramel complexion. Really cute.
Josh – Well thats great Michelle.. I’m happy for you.
Issac – Guess its just you and me Josh.
Josh – ….Lets go to Vegas and get married.
Issac – *laugh*
Michelle – Lets go walk on the beach, my ass hurts from sitting here.
Issac – Alright, c’mon Josh.
Josh – Okay.
We got up and walked around…. and then we stopped to talk a little bit more.
Issac – Hey Josh?
Josh – Yeah?
Issac – I know with everything going on… you probably want to get away for a little bit right?
Josh – ….I don’t know.. why?
Michelle – Issac had this idea that we should all go somewhere.
Josh – You too?
Michelle – Yeah.
Issac – Kaitlyn and I talked about it, and she’s willing to go if everyone else agrees.
Josh – …….Hmm
Michelle – We still have to talk to Jordan, and Gabrielle.
Issac – Vince and Kokoro too..
Michelle – Are they still on the rocks?
Issac – Yeah…
Josh – ……
Issac – Oh! and you can bring Matt
Michelle – Umm.. I’ll see if its something he wants to do.
Josh – Everyone will be coupled up..
Issac – Not me.
Josh – You’ll have Kaitlyn
Issac – And you’ll have me.
Josh – …..
Michelle – I think you should come.
Josh – I don’t know….
Issac – This trip could be a good thing.
Michelle – ……Josh?
Josh – …..I don’t know if I want to go or not..
Issac – You still have some time to decide.
I don’t know… I feel like if I go, I’ll be miserable and drag everyone else down. At the same time I know that if I don’t go, everyone will be sad that I’m home alone. I’m just really emotionally drained, and don’t know if I feel like doing anything. I’m always so happy, or positive during bad times. With everything that has happen in the past week I’m not sure if a trip is what I need. Maybe I need time to myself.. alone. Is this what depression feels like?
~End of Chapter Five- Pt 2~